


dead anime moms

by exocara



Category: Katekyou Hitman Reborn!
Genre: BAMF!Tsuna, Fourth Wall, Gen, Nana has dead anime mom hair, Tsuna knows he's a main character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-09
Updated: 2015-09-09
Packaged: 2018-04-19 21:57:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4762508
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/exocara/pseuds/exocara
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As we all know, the world of Katekyo Hitman Reborn has canon parallel universes. There are certain parallel universes in which almost everything is the same, except for one small tiny detail. In some cases, things would have been the same, if not for this small tiny detail. ‘For want of a nail’ would be an appropriate term to describe this effect; the effect of a small tiny detail resulting in a ripple effect that massively changes things.</p>
<p>In one particular parallel universe, Nana had slightly longer hair which she wore in a loose side ponytail.</p>
            </blockquote>





	dead anime moms

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [All According to Script](https://archiveofourown.org/works/4484691) by [PurpleButtons0203](https://archiveofourown.org/users/PurpleButtons0203/pseuds/PurpleButtons0203). 



> this is just crack. i'm sorry.

As we all know, the world of Katekyo Hitman Reborn has  _canon_  parallel universes. There are certain parallel universes in which almost everything is the same, except for one small tiny detail. In some cases, things  _would_ have been the same, if not for this small tiny detail. ‘ _For want of a nail_ ’ would be an appropriate term to describe this effect; the effect of a small  _tiny_  detail resulting in a ripple effect that massively changes things.

In one particular parallel universe, Nana had slightly longer hair which she wore in a loose side ponytail.

-o-

Something weird happened to Tsuna when he was five. It kind of sucked, suddenly being so off balance and all that, but Tsuna could cope. However, what he  _couldn’t_  cope with was the sudden increase in accidents around his mother. Car accidents, kitchen accidents, ladder accidents,  _flower pot accidents_ … If Tsuna hadn’t stuck around his mother and pulled her out of the way, he was sure she would have been long dead.

At the tender age of seven, Tsuna had his first near death experience. A car lost control and skidded towards them. Tsuna pushed his mother out of the way and was struck by said car. Death came down to collect him, scythe and all, but paused when they felt something weird. There was a strange warmth coming from Tsuna’s body, which was incredibly odd. Dead people were not warm. An orange flame flickered to life on Tsuna’s head and then…

“GET MUM SAFELY HOME WITH MY DYING WILL!!!!!”

_Ah. So he’s one of those._

Death decided to ignore the boy from then on. No matter how they tried, those sort of Protagonist Characters would never die, so why bother?

-o-

At the tender age of seven, right after Tsuna carried his mother home (in his underwear, with his dying will), Tsuna came to the startling conclusion. There were three things that he was absolutely sure of. First, he was an Anime Protagonist. Second, there was a part of him – and incredibly strong part of him – that just would not die. And third, his mother was going to  _die_.

Tsuna narrowed his eyes.

He would not allow that to happen.

-o-

When he was eight years old, Nana informed Tsuna that his father had become a star. Tsuna felt very annoyed by that tidbit of information. The Narrative  _really_  was adamant in giving him a tragic backstory, wasn’t it? Trying to take his mother away from his wasn’t enough, they had to take his father too!

This fact only served to further strengthen his resolve.

“I’ll protect you, mum!” Tsuna said, eyes burning orange. Nana smiled and patted Tsuna on the head.

“Then I have nothing to worry about,” she replied. At the exact same time, a robber broke into the house.

Tsuna threw a chair at him.

-o-

As Tsuna grew up, he was saddled with a nickname. Unlike in canon, this nickname wasn’t Dame-Tsuna for Tsuna wasn’t useless. He was still bad at schoolwork and was still unable to refuse requests, but he was definitely not useless.

His new nickname was ‘Mommy’s Boy Tsuna’.

Anyone who knew Tsuna would sooner or later witness the total and utter protectiveness he had for his mother. They also had to admit that it wasn’t unfounded. It seemed like misfortune followed Sawada Nana around quite closely. Accidents, natural disasters, and criminal acts of violence were the most common.

Tsuna’s act of pushing his mother out of the line of a lightning strike was something that many people would never forget. The following beat down Tsuna gave to the pickpocket who tried to pickpocket Nana right after the lightning strike was also pretty hard to forget.

Tsuna also had the tendency to suddenly stand up in the middle of lesson, say “My mother needs me” and simply jump out of the window. He always had window seats. Even when the teachers decided that it would be better for Tsuna to sit near a door, his new seat would somehow  _always_  be by a window. It was useless to prevent that, similar to how it was useless to prevent Tsuna from leaving in the middle of class. Even the infamous  _Hibari Kyoya_  was unable to keep Tsuna in school.

Sometimes, it seemed that the only reason Tsuna went to school in the first place was because his mother wanted him to. Everyone was sure that if Tsuna could, he would stick by his mother twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, he would do it.

Hence, ‘Mommy’s Boy Tsuna’.

-o-

That was a hitman, wasn’t it? He dressed as a hitman, carried himself like a hitman, had  _guns_  like a hitman…

But he was, like, three years old or something.

Tsuna squinted at the baby who was hiding in a tree. Was he a threat? On one hand, hitman. On the other hand, three year old child.

“Tsu-kun!” his mother called. “Why are you standing outside the house like that? Come in, silly!”

“Alright, mum!”

The baby was probably a threat. If a small plastic watering can was capable of almost taking Nana’s life, a baby definitely  _could_  kill his mother.

But seriously, baby hitmen? The Narrative was getting  _real_ desperate, wasn’t it?

-o-

“Tsu-kun, I’ve hired a home tutor for you!” Reborn heard Nana say. That was his cue to go in.

He was immediately assaulted by a barrage of knives, glue, and  _wasabi paste_ , of all things.

-o-

Reborn managed to evade all the traps. He opened the door to Tsuna’s room and was instantly met with an icy, hostile glare from Tsuna as the boy shifted so that he was between Nana and Reborn.

“Ciaossu, I’m the new home tutor, Reborn,” Reborn introduced himself. Tsuna rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, right. ‘Home tutor’.” He could hear the quotation marks about the word home tutor. Before Reborn could reply, however, Tsuna turned to Nana. “Mum, could you let your hair down for a while?”

“Oh, but I find it hard to do housework with my hair down,” Nana said.

“It’s alright, mum. I’ll do your housework for you! You just have to sit down and be safe. Read a book or watch a show or something. Be safe,” Tsuna said, a tone of urgency in his voice.

“Alright, if it’ll make Tsu-kun happy,” Nana relented and undid her hair tie. “I’ll be in my room if you need me!”

“Okay. Stay safe!”

Nana left the room and Tsuna looked at Reborn with a wary stare. “Who are you and what do you want?” Tsuna demanded. Reborn realised that it was no use beating around the bush with Tsuna and decided to be honest.

“I’m here to make you a mafia boss.”

There were a lot of reactions Reborn expected. Fear, horror, shock, anger, denial…

Tsuna walked to the window and opened it.

“ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!” he yelled. “I HAVE TO DEAL WITH  _MAFIA_ NOW? NORMAL THUGS WEREN’T ENOUGH? YOU HAD TO DRAG THE  _DAMNED MAFIA_  INTO ALL OF THIS?”

He spent the next five seconds simply screaming up into the sky before closing the window.

For once in his life, Reborn wasn’t sure how he was supposed to react.

**Author's Note:**

> wanted to give this to PurpleButtons0203 but i couldn't find them oh well (disgruntled) i'll try again at another date.


End file.
